about that time

It's interesting to think what my life would be like today with just a few short shifts in fate.

Recently a very close friend of mine, who also happens to be an Army Girlfriend, gave me some bad news. Her soldier applied for the same program Sgt. was accepted into and he was rejected. Granted, it's not like free candy, and Sgt. worked his butt off not only on the packet for the application but his entire Army career which set the file that was eventually granted acceptance. Since my friends soldier was not accepted, he will be deploying very soon for the second time.

Last deployment we were going through it together. Our deployments overlapped so as her soldier was coming home, Sgt. still had a few months left in country, but still... we went through it together.

It's true what they say, about the bond forged between women who have a loved one deployed. I couldn't have imagined a quicker or stronger friendship.

I'm sad that the cards didn't work out for her the same way, it's just another reminder at how blessed I truly am to be in the situation I'm in.

Sgt. would be training up right now. Getting ready for his third deployment. I would be getting ready as well, preparing myself, as much as you can anyway, for our long separation. Would our relationship be as strong as it is now? Would I ever have gotten the privilege to wake up next to him every morning? Would he still be in Germany, and us still only able to see each other once every 6 months or so? There's no telling really.

With three years left in our in-between Army world I'm resolved to enjoy every moment. Will it make it harder down the road? Maybe. How will I feel during our second deployment together when he's been home and close for so long? So much can happen in that amount of time... just look whats happened in a year! The entire course of our lives, our relationship, shifted because a series of very fortunate events. Or maybe, maybe it was always supposed to be this way. I'm typically a big believer in that. The other side to the coin is that this year has gone by so fast... I find myself wondering how fast the next three will be.

I'm so grateful to have what we have together. When I started blogging half way through Sgt.'s deployment over a year ago... I never imagined I'd be here. Now I know anything is possible :) good and bad of course... which is why the here and now is so wonderful.

I don't wish Sgt. was deploying again right now, although from time to time I think he does. No matter where he is or what he's doing, he is a soldier to his core... and I see that. I am not hurt or surprised that he would long for his work and his duty. I do wish though, that I could be there for my friend as I was before. Not just someone who's "been there" but someone who was there at that exact same moment. This may sound weird to say, and I'm sure it won't come out exactly how I feel it but, there is a certain pride that comes with saying "My boyfriend? He's deployed. Yes I miss him, but we take it a day at a time. I'm proud of him. The waiting isn't so bad" of being able to say we did it, we made it. If I had to pick a positive about a deployment, I suppose that's the one I'd choose. It doesn't make me miss him less when he's gone, and it doesn't make any of it any easier, but it does give you a warm fuzzy from time to time.... and everyone can use one of those.

He could be working long hours and getting ready for his third trip to the other side of the world. Instead, he will be home in a few hours from work, and he'll wake me up off the couch or in bed if I can make it, and he'll kiss me goodnight.... and our life will continue on this course it's meant to be on.

I just think it's necessary from time to time to remember how I could just as easily be saying:

He's working long hours and he's getting ready for his third trip to the other side of the world. He'll call in a few hours to say goodnight, and I love you... and our life will continue on this course it's meant to be on.

Oh, you're ganna want to hear this one

Here is a story of how our first car buying experience together went....

The back story here is that my poor Protege came to an early end when she was rear-ended back in May. The car was totalled and my dreams of continuing to not have a car payment seemed teetery at best.

In reality, getting hit was probably a blessing because my transmission was going out anyway and getting the settlement for the totalled car would help us purchase a new one...which was coming anyway.

We decided to purchase the salvage title for my car thinking "Hey, it still runs, at least this will give us time to shop around for the best deal" and it ended up giving us about two weeks.... last week the transmission started failing on me and we have to jump start my poor girl to life every morning so we have been frantically searching for another car.

I have never had to purchase a car before, my first and second car (the only two I've ever owned) were both given to me by my parents so I have been very lucky to have someone else do the dirty work. Sgt. spent the entire week searching through private vehicle listings and discussing with me what I was looking for and what I would love, because he wanted so badly to make me happy and to also get me something that would be a good deal.

He really was a life saver in all of this. I don't know what I would have done without him. I tend to deal with stress in the "Ostrich method" When I see it coming I walk along until it gets so close I stick my head in the sand hoping it will disappear and then I have a breakdown (much like sitting in front of the computer crying after looking at cars online for 4 hours) and THEN I am able to attack. Once all my other defenses are spent.

Sgt. on the other hand, deals with stress in the "Cat method." You know that poster where the kitty is barely hanging onto the tree limb? Stress pushes at him and he pushes back. Hard. He will dig his claws in without a second thought and attack head on. Which he did in this situation and I am immensely grateful.

Like many things in life, he is my rock, and this was no different.

We were getting into a situation we didn't want to be in, which was NEEDING to buy a car SOON. We decided on getting a cash car. Using the money we got from my car being totalled and searching for a good deal. Just something reliable that will get me to and from my 40-min-one-way commute and something I would like.

Then we come to this weekend. And we do NOTHING but look at cars, and talk about cars, and sigh with frustration about cars, and maybe a few tears on my part about cars, and call people about cars, and lower our standards on cars... blah blah blah.

It's Sunday now.

Sgt. worked from 11pm - 8am. He came home and we ate a donut together, and he slept for ONLY an hour and a half. Then he woke up and got back to helping me search for cars. We called 4 different people yesterday morning leaving messages. We went and looked at one car which was owned by a typical former used car salesman who was really wanting us to pay WAY over KBB value for a car with a bad transmission. No thank you.

Then we find this car.

This car on craigslist which is posted by a father selling the car for his deployed son. His deployed mechanic son. His deployed mechanic son who just replaced this, this, this, this, this, this, this, and this on the car before deploying. His deployed son who just replaced this, this, this, this, this, this, this, and this on the car and then had the radio stolen out of the car while it was in the hold lot. His deployed son who just replaced all this and then had the unfortunate luck to have his radio stolen out of the car by some other soldier. His deployed son who just replaced all this, had his radio stolen, and who also has the difficult situation of having his young wife at home who really needs to sell the car because she needs the money.

and our hearts swell with the hope of helping another soldier and his family while still getting something we need.

And we EVEN asked to get his APO address so we could send him a care package.

Because after Sgt. had only slept 2 hours in over 24 and I was at my wits end looking at cars and we DID find a car that drove better than anything else we looked at, we didn't question the story. We didn't really think about all the details lining up. We bought the car at KBB listed value and drove home happy as clams. After a night of sleep, a weird feeling, and highly tuned facebook/myspace/and AKO white page stalking skills.... we find out the real story.

The unit his son belongs to just got BACK from Afghanistan, they're not deployed nor deploying. And the guy listed on the title, the "Army Mechanic Son", in fact states his job as an infantry man in the training room.... not a mechanic at all. It looks like he and his wife just got married. If he was married when he deployed (as he said he was) why would his car be in the hold lot on post? But hey, still could've gotten broken into, right? But there is no sign of forced entry. Then again, the car was probably in housing since he was married (if he was) and if it was in housing it's still likely that his wife could have left her door unlocked and some poor soul just opened the door and took their stereo. However, whoever did that really took their time clipping all of the wires off so you can easily install a new stereo with an install kit. (thinking, they wanted to keep their radio... how about you?)

So yeah. We got dooped. On the "deployed solider in a bad way" story. The only things that really make me mad are 1. those details are things we KNOW.... but we just trusted because it sounded like a worthy cause and we were tired. 2. It makes Sgt. feel like he failed me in some sort of way and he didn't. He was my life saver and God-send in all of it. 3. I was going to send a really good care package. I was looking forward to it.

Do I still like the car even though the people I bought it from are less than honest? Yes. Especially if it works exactly the way they said. Do I think I paid a fair price for it? Yeah... I probably would've offered him a little lower but I didn't want to low ball some soldiers wife so I just offered KBB value and took it. What probably happened is they wanted to sell their 98 Toyota Camry but weren't able to easily around Ft. Campbell because all of those soldiers just got back and soldiers who just got back from deployment are usually much more eager to jump in to something they can spend their hard earned extra cash on. So in the end I suppose I still got an ok deal... and we came out the good guys which I'm always ok with.

That's alright though. Luckily, I'm in love with a man who actually is connected to the Army and was a deployed NCO, and knows better. Spc. will get a call later on to make sure he's not running some kind of scam. And to make sure that my newly purchased car isn't going to blow up this week.

Some people. I swear.

He saw me in my Spanx

Seriously.

For a little background here, I don't know if anyone else out there owns a pair of Spanx but they are these wondrous little body shapers you can wear under any clothing to smooth everything out and hold anything in. I bought mine while in college and have loved them ever since. And yes, they are the obnoxious and embarrassing from-under-the-boobs-down-to-mid-thigh kind. (And now that I've said boob creepers will be here in no time.)

Actually one of the first times I ever wore my spanx was under the dress I wore to Sgt.'s Cav ball. We had been dating about two month and when I got dressed at his apartment (I lived about an hour away) I left all of my bags in his bathroom so that once we got home from Cav ball I could make the "I really have to pee" excuse and cruise in there to take them off in case... ya know... Annnnnyyyywwaaaayyyy

Well yesterday I was putting on my insanely cute red white and blue plaid dress for the day. Sgt. was laying on the bed and I'm standing half in and half out of the closet. When I came out to twirl around and receive my adoring compliments :) he said "It looks great babe! You really do look great, I don't know why you don't wear more tight fitting clothing, all your dresses seem kind of poofy"

I might preface this part with the fact that I've lost about 6lbs since moving here. Yay me!

True, I'm very fond of the A line dress and the empire waist. I just think they're flattering on me. That is his definition of poofy. However, I've also got this little bitty, not so flat, although not fat tummy thing which is where the Spanx come in handy! Not to mention the fact that I don't really have a lot of places to go that require corsets or skin tight dresses....

But ok, I'll see how this plays out honey.

"Well I just think these are more comfortable, but I have that bridesmaids dress that's pretty form fitting."

So now we're playing fashion show and he's absolutely enjoying watching me dress and undress in all these dresses.

I put the bridesmaids dress on which is made out of that silky-satiny material that grabs and hangs on to absolutely every single curve one has. Even if your panties create a little hug in the waist, this dress shows it. *eye roll* but I wore the thing. So I put it on for Sgt. and he oohs and aahs at how fabulous I look. And me being he woman I am point out my not flat-not fat tummy thing and mention the spanx.

He insists he doesn't know what I'm talking about and says I look great, but he is intrigued by the mention of watching me try on something else.

So I agree to try the dress on with the spanx underneath.

If you have ever had to put these things on, you'll start laughing about here. Because they're tight. And to get into them requires a fair bit of stretching and jumping. Plus they're not cute. So I go into the closet to find them and I show them to him in all their not-yet-stretched-over-my-body tiny glory and then head back to the closet to change into them, out of sight.

My plan was to put the spanx on, put the dress on, and then come out.

His plan was different.

When he saw me heading back he was like "no no no, just put them on." "What, here?" "yeah" "this is not going to be sexy honey, I promise, just give me a second" "please?"

After more back and forth I agreed to come out once they were on... just so he could see them on.

Yeah really.

And his response? "that's awesome babe! That kind of looks like those one-piece wrestler suits!"

I did put the dress on over it to prove my point but he insisted there was no difference and I look great both ways. Such a wonderful man, don't you think? :)

I can't believe I just mortified us but in fairness, I did say while this was all going on, "I'm going to blog about this"

Two years ago the mere thought of him knowing I even had ON Spanx was horrific.... now I'm parading around our bedroom in them.

Atleast I know he really loves me!

Pearls while road marching

Here's a nice recap of the last few days since I've been meaning to post since Saturday!

This weekend was really great! Really, we had one of the best weekends and we never left far from home (and honestly spent very little money).

So Sgt. is training/getting ready for Air Assault school which is coming up in... oh... 8 weeks? August. Anyway, Air Assault (I was going to put AA but... didn't want anyone confused on were he's headed) has this 12 mile ruck in a 3 hour time limit. So, Sgt. tells me earlier in the week that Saturday he's going to walk to the University and back. Well my first thought was "cool, can I come?" and since I don't really have much of a filter I said "Cool, can I come?"

Saturday morning rolls around and our goal of a 8am departure turned into around 10am but head out we did. Sgt. was in his ACU's with a ruck sack and about.... 20lbs(?) added. I was in normal workout attire and to top it all off, a baseball cap and pearl earrings. I'm pretty classy, what can I say? The truth is I wore them just because I really don't take them off often, they're my every day earrings, but it amused Sgt.

Well all in all it ended up being a little over 4 miles and really a good time spent together. We talked and joked around, all the while attempting to keep his pace. The only problem there is that the man is a good 8 inches taller than me and I have short legs to boot so in order to keep up I was taking almost two steps to each of his. There were a few times where I was over compensating thinking "I don't want to walk behind him because I don't want him to slow down thinking he's got to hold back for me, he's supposed to be training" but after being asked three times to quit speeding up because I was throwing off his natural pace I figured a step behind wouldn't kill me.

Sunday we did the normal household chores and errands and then we decided to go hiking at one of the national battlefields close by. We packed a picnic, the camera, and headed out! That was a lot of fun too! Just spending time together.

A lot of pictures were taken of me, none of him because he's much more fond of snapping the photos. And after walking probably a mile we found an off beat trail and laid out our blanket. I had a blast and later that night in bed we talked about what a great weekend it had been.

THEN.... yes, there's more, yesterday was just one of those days. By 8am I had already called three different companies concerning one problem or another. Trying to deal with getting my car totalled out (which by the way, I think if someone hits you, and they end up totalling your car and that car is completely paid for, they should add 5,000 dollars to your settlement so that you can actually afford to buy another car ....which will likely require you to now budget for car payments.... grrr) and when I got to work I had to sit in the parking lot for about 5 minutes to finish getting the cry out and compose myself. It didn't get a whole lot better from there.

Sgt. knew it had been an awful day (because he had to hear about it multiple times) but he kept a really calm composure and was extremely reassuring and encouraging for me. When I rolled into the door around 7:45pm I was beat and just glad to be home. He helped me set my stuff down and wrapped me in a big hug and then took me by the hand and led me into the bathroom.

When I walked in the door there are candles lit around our tub and a hot bath that was drawn only a couple of minutes before. He kissed me and told me just to relax. After I got in the tub he came back in with a glass of wine and I'm completely speechless. I just kept smiling like a fool and saying thank you. Strange part is that this is not the first, or even the second time he's done this on a bad day of mine... I'm just always still so surprised and thankful that he's who he is.

After my much needed bath he brought me a robe and finished up dinner while I sat and just watched him. A little Michael Buble mix on Pandora and a faux fireplace screen saver playing on our TV.... life doesn't get much better than this.

Now it's today. He's sitting behind me studying for a physics test he's got tomorrow. We ordered Chinese food and had a beer earlier. There is a basket of laundry sitting in front of me that's saying "no, you don't have to fold us tonight... we'll wait... you can always throw us back in the dryer if you want..." and now he's actually reading his Physics out loud. Yep.... really, I just hear the words "kinetic energy"

Life still doesn't get much better.

Life is good

So Sgt. and I were goofing off on the computer the other day when he went to my blog link and I knew I hadn't posted in a while but a whole month? Seriously? I don't think that's happened since... well.... ever?

Honestly? Life is so completely wonderful and going so well... I have nothing to say, other than just that. It's great. SO SO Great!

Sure, Sgt. and I have had our disagreements since I moved here. I think I've stomped into the house on more than one occasion, but nothing that isn't solved by the end of the day. Still though, coming up on three months living together and I still look at him and say "I love our life together"

Just last night Sgt. was sitting out on our back porch that's right off the living room. He had the door open because we were chatting, and I was leaning on the couch thumbing through a book. He was quiet for a minute and then he said "Ya know, looking into our home at night like this... it really looks... homey, like a home... it's been a long time since I've lived somewhere like that... thank you honey." Cue the huge cheesy grin on my face. And it's true. I love our life here. Tennessee has been good to me, I love my job and I even got a huge compliment from what would be the equivalent of our superintendent the other day. She got me a gift card because she just happened to visit our school and was "blown away" with my room and me, and everything I had done. I could've been walking on clouds the rest of the day, I'm tellin ya. The best part though, is of course, him. Our life is wonderful. It's content. It's growing. It's learning. But above anything else it's loving and full of life. We don't do gloriously exciting things every weekend. Some days we cook dinner together, other days we order out, and some days, we don't eat dinner together at all because of our schedules. There are days when the apartment is a mess and both of us would like to clean it, but we'd rather spend the two hours we have home together, together, and not cleaning, so we leave it be. The laundry isn't always done and sometimes we're even snappy and frustrated. He is annoyed that I wait until the dish washer is packed full before starting it in order to save water... because we're left with no dishes. I could stand for him to actually wake up the first time the alarm goes off so that fifteen minutes of my morning isn't spent trying to coerce him out of bed :). But that's our life. One I wouldn't change for the world.

Out of all the ordinary there is the extraordinary. This morning he came home after working the graveyard shift. Up all night and the first thing he does is quietly close the bedroom door so he doesn't wake me. I wake up an hour later at the sound of the same door opening and this gorgeous man walking in with a tray full of breakfast for me. Breakfast in bed, for me, after working from 11pm to 7am. Why? Because he loves me he says, because he's lucky he says, and then he makes a joke of personal nature ;). And that's not the first time he's done something wonderful like that.

I suppose I could blog a lot more, but it all seems so simple when I go to write. I'm happy. So wonderfully, blissfully, sickeningly happy. My day is pretty much the same every day. I wake up to the person I love, I get ready for work, he helps me rush around the apartment to find the things I've forgotten, he kisses me goodbye, I head to work where my day is filled with "Ms. KJ I love you." and also "*student* please stop. Is that something you're supposed to be doing? No? Then make a better choice" I chat with co-workers and then head home after work to a smile at the door, some kind of dinner, and an early bed time. But I feel more alive than I've ever felt.

So there you have it. Things are going wonderfully. I have been keeping up with reading the blogs, though I've been a crappy commenter and I apologize. The good news is I'm so wrapped up in what I'm doing here I don't sit down a lot to talk about it. I know some loved ones have returned home and some are getting ready to leave. Congratulations and good luck! I do still think about my little blog family out there :)

Hope everyone is doing fabulously!