Monday, October 25, 2010

The bedding debacle of 2010

So... we registered for bedding, and then the bedding that we wanted kind of disappeared.  So while shopping one day my Step Mom insisted she get us bedding and that there was this great sale at Stein-Mart and she knew we would find something there.  So I went... and I was swept up by sale prices.  Words like "20 piece set" and "Under $200.00" flashed before my eyes and I'm a fan of any good deal so I picked out one I thought was not too feminine and not too plain.  With 20 pieces because of course I want the matching throw pillows. 


I got it home and took it all out and immediately had buyers remorse.  I hate it.  It's completely not my style.. way too busy... it's this aqua and sea green color with bold patterns on it.  But I could deal if it was just the look (maybe).  It's also cheap fabric.  It's this poly synthetic-itch-awkward-burns when you try to iron it- kind of material.  I hate it.  It looks cheap, it feels cheap on the skin,  and when our cats scratch it, it sounds cheap. Hate it!

And.... that wouldn't be so bad even if it wasn't too big for our bed!  I have no idea what I was thinking or why I thought that a queen sized set would fit on our full sized bed... but I did and I was wrong.  The bed skirt hangs off the ends.. it's just ugly... all of it.

SO... here we are and I am begging my new husband for new bedding.  Of course... he sees none of the imperfections I do, but it's driving me insane.  I feel like our bathroom and our bedroom should be where we splurge on nice furnishings if for no other reason... than it's just peaceful, and it's a bedroom we enjoy being in.  But I can't find bedding I like in a full size. (que whining and incessant foot stomping here)

I want bedding that matches.  I want bedding that is lighter in color with soft luxurious sheets.  I want a little bit of color/pattern but not overwhelming.  I want some texture, but not big texture.  And I want it in full size.

Any ideas?  Anyone?!  I need help!  I want something like this: Bedding

Sleeping in Horror.

Monday, October 18, 2010

I am married!

That's right ladies and gentlemen, he put another ring on it.  Right now my husband is taking a shower so I had a quick moment to hop on and give you the short version of the best day ever!

The day was beautiful, not too warm and not too cold.  The ceremony was perfect... we were even able to light our unity candle despite the soft breeze flowing through the outdoor chapel.  We didn't cry but instead smiled widely at each other, teared up a little, and held hands tightly.  The food turned out great and I was even able to eat some of it!  The crab and artichoke dip was, as I was told many times, out of this world! The DJ did an amazing job and played exactly what I wanted and timed everything perfectly.  We kissed and laughed and smiled for tons of pictures, we danced and sang and drank and laughed the night away. 

It was amazing.  I miss it!  It just goes by so fast.  But I am incredibly happy to finally be married to my best friend, and the love of my life.  I am in love with being married!

Friday, October 15, 2010

And cue the tears...

Today is my wedding rehearsal... WOWWW

I can feel myself near spontaneous tear fest almost every minute - or maybe that's just because i just got finished picking out the readings for our wedding... which is tomorrow. Yeah. Procrastinate much?

Aside from ridiculous family drama, we have been very blessed and fortunate to have so many helpful hands throughout our wedding.  I just hope this rehearsal goes smoothly and that tomorrow goes easy. The wedding elves (i.e. my two best friends from college) and myself were up late last night decorating the reception site, and added lots of fun memories to our collection :)  You just haven't lived until you've strung Christmas lights, made a tutu, and lit candles while singing "Carryout" and drinking wine.  That's all I'm saying.

My very-soon-to-be husband is on his way and I will be leaving soon to pick up my favorite photographer and friend Lindsay and everything else should happen smoothly according to my OCD checklist. 

Can I be honest though?  Sgt. and I have not been exactly gaga this week for each other.... we've been snippy, short, and irritated at each other.  Here I was expecting the week before our wedding to be all smiles and I love you's and instead... bickering.  Does this mean we aren't supposed to be getting married, or does it mean that he's unsure?  I've decided no.  The reason I've decided no is because, and get this because this is the important part, we love one another. It is as complicated and simple as that.  I know we love each other.  The fact that this has been an incredibly stressful week for us both, me with wedding putting-together and him with three tests before fall break hits, meant that we weren't always communicating effectively and what we were really saying to the other is "I miss you, I need you."  I am confident in us.  In our love for one another... we have grown into a steady love over these last 3 1/2 years.  A love that makes me excited to see him, even if he tried to switch the hotel reservation after telling me to book it.  A love that makes me giddy with the thought of hugging him and kissing him as soon as he gets off the plane, even if he reminds me constantly how much we are over budget (I know.. I know), a love that makes me honored to be able to call him my husband tomorrow, because I know that no matter what happens in life, even when we disagree or find it hard to make a compromise, he has nothing but my happiness, and the best of intentions, at heart. 

So, to end, and since I'll probably disappear from my blog for a few days, I thought I'd share a few of my favorite poems I found while looking for wedding readings. Send lots of good, beautiful thoughts my way!!

By C.S. Lewis:
"If the old fairy-tale ending "They lived happily ever after" is taken to mean "They felt for the next fifty years exactly as they felt the day before they were married," then it says what probably never was nor ever would be true, and would be highly undesirable if it were. Who could bear to live in that excitement for even five years? What would become of your work, your appetite, your sleep, your friendships? But, of course, ceasing to be "in love" need not mean ceasing to love. Love in this second sense-love as distinct from "being in love"—is not merely a feeling. It is a deep unity, maintained by the will and deliberately strengthened by habit; reinforced by (in Christian marriages) the grace which both partners ask, and receive, from God. They can have this love for each other even at those moments when they do not like each other; as you love yourself even when you do not like yourself. They can retain this love even when each would easily, if they allowed themselves, be "in love" with someone else. "Being in love" first moved them to promise fidelity: this quieter love enables them to keep the promise. It is on this love that the engine of marriage is run: being in love was the explosion that started it."

By: Anne Morrow Lindbergh
When you love someone, you do not love them all the time, in exactly the same way, from moment to moment. It is an impossibility. It is even a lie to pretend to. And yet this is exactly what most of us demand. We have so little faith in the ebb and flow of life, of love, of relationships. We leap at the flow of the tide and resist in terror its ebb. We are afraid it will never return. We insist on permanency, on duration, on continuity; when the only continuity possible, in life as in love, is in growth, in fluidity - in freedom, in the sense that the dancers are free, barely touching as they pass, but partners in the same pattern.

The only real security is not in owning or possessing, not in demanding or expecting, mot in hoping, even. Security in a relationship lies neither in looking back to what was in nostalgia, nor forward to what it might be in dread or anticipation, but living in the present relationship and accepting it as it is now. Relationships must be like islands, one must accept them for what they are here and now, within their limits - islands, surrounded and interrupted by the sea, and continually visited and abandoned by the tides.

Monday, October 11, 2010

Going to the chapel... 4 days away!

Well we made it to Texas on Friday after a very stressful drive!  We woke up at 1:00 am and left by 2:00 am - with four hours of sleep we hit the road, hoping to make it to Austin in time for Sgt.'s 6:55pm flight.  The drive was insane.  We barely made it to the airport in time for his flight when we found out that it had been delayed. Great. 

Did I mention that my fiance was nice enough to get up crazy early JUST to make the drive to Texas with me and then fly straight back to TN?  He will seriously do anything if it means I will be a little bit safer or a little more happy.  I love him.

He eventually got back to TN and I eventually got on with my bachelorette party :)  lots of fun in Austin and now that the week has begun I'm in full wedding planning mode.  Well, more wedding-putting-together I suppose.  Most of it's planned, now it's all about the execution.  It still hasn't hit me that we'll be married this weekend!  I'm excited, I'm nervous, I'm a ball of energy, But I think that all of the to-do's are keeping me from seeing the Saturday aisle stroll.  Or maybe it won't hit until my fiance is here, in my arms?  Who knows. 

For now I'm going to try and enjoy this time with my family and friends, and enjoy my final days of being engaged... it really has been a fun and amazing 9 months.  Nothing compares to seeing him get down on one knee... or that first call you make to your family to tell them the news. I thoughtfully and slowly wrote out each note to my bridesmaids and closest friends to ask them to be a part of my special day.  I remember the first time I slipped into a wedding dress... and the first time I slipped into MY wedding dress.  Picking menu's and invitations... changing the font from script 1 to script 2 because I didn't like the way the e looked.  I loved watching him pick out his wedding band, and loved it even more when he proceed to "try it on" sporadically around the house for the last 5 months.  I had so much FUN taking our engagement pictures... and I cried when I saw them for the first time.. they were so fitting for the two of us, I felt beautiful, and I couldn't wait to show the world how we look in love.  I remember dipping into our wedding fund to put a down payment on a new car after the flood took my old one. But it was ok, because THIS was planning for a marriage, and not for a wedding.  I remember the tears leaving the church and feeling defeated, and I remember the struggle of deciding on a wedding venue that we felt accomplished all the aspects of our wedding that were important to us, especially our faith.  He fought so hard for me to be happy and was willing to move mountains to give me the day that I wanted... he wouldn't let anyone walk on me, or turn our special day into a debate. He is my hero. There were many back-and-forths over the menu and the flowers.  There was a last minute cake decision and a last minute hair cut that wasn't exactly what I'd hoped for, but in the end they both worked out.  My shower was filled with love and happy times and I was so proud of myself for all the "All about Sgt." questions I answered correctly.  I must have set aside 7 different father-daughter dance song options and can't wait for my dad to get home tonight so we can go through them together and pick one.  Did I mention I've cried a lot?  Excited tears, frustrated tears, happy tears, hurt tears... and yes, there is a chance I'm crying now thinking about all that this next week will bring.  I can't wait to spend my life with him.  There is still lots to be done... the favors need putting together and the rehearsal dinner needs to be confirmed.  The wishing tree needs to be "planted" and I still have to drop off a check to the caterer.  But the rest of our life has already begun, and as we close the door to our engagement we're opening the door to our future... which is looking mighty bright my friends.  I can't wait!

Tuesday, October 5, 2010

A 1/4 of an inch to an 1/8 of an inch

So this morning I stumble around at an early 4:00 am but hey, it's all worth it when the man wakes me up with a Chai Tea Latte.  He gets up insanely early.... like 2:00am these days trying to get all his homework finished up (taking 18 hours... and volunteering and such makes for a very tired fiance) so I try and get up a little after him so we can have at least 10-15 minutes to chat and visit before work and school take up the rest of our day.  Anyway... I'm straying from the point.  This morning after I woke up, I asked him if he needed help with anything and he said "yeah, you can put my uniform together if you'd like" Tuesday is ACU day so I cheerfully stuck on patch by patch, I straightened and aligned badges and when it was all done he came over and said "Good job baby!  Just this one..." and he adjusted his wings.  Task completed.  When we walked into the kitchen for more coffee I said "I'm pretty good honey, you should be proud of me!" (as you can tell I'm quite modest)

And just to drive the point home, he was, and I am proud of me too... at least it made me feel like I've learned something with all this time in enlisted Army and in-between Army wold.  It's the little victories I suppose.  *pats self on the back*

Monday, October 4, 2010

Confessions of a prior-service-cadet's fiance

I'm a stalker. A post Stalker.  And by post I mean Army Post.  Dear blog world, my name is K.J. and I frequently google future possibilities.

Does anyone else do this?  Eh... maybe not.. I guess that wouldn't surprise me... especially because we don't KNOW where that will be.  It's interesting to me though.  I like to look up different posts around the country, see how their website is set up (yes, user friendliness gets bonus points) I like to view their housing options, check out possible spouse clubs or other things to do in the area.  I don't really have a preference yet, I just like to look.  A form of day-dreaming if you will.

There is absolutely no point in it other than I like information... as previously discussed.  And with this in-between Army world coming to an end sooner rather than later I am excited about heading back to active duty.  I love the time with him and am trying to soak it all in but I think the future looks exciting.  Call me an optimist. Or a stalker.  Whichever you prefer.