I really want a dog.

Really. I'm resisting because my apartment is big enough for me. It can fit a couple more people comfortably for a visit but other than that it's not really the type of place you share. Now, rationally I figure I could get a medium - small sized dog and the dog and I could co-exist in harmony in our tiny dwelling... but realistically I know that I am not a little dog person... so that rules that out. Medium sized dogs are ok, but I know if I go to the pound I will inevitably fall in love with the most adorable puppy known to man who will then grow up to be the most adorable and spoiled ginormous dog ever. That's just how I operate. I can't pick small dogs. I've tried... but I have a few factors working against me. 1. I want a male dog. Which unfortunately for me tends to be the larger sex of the breed. 2. I loooovvveee big dogs, Labradors, bull mastiffs... BIG dogs and it's highly likely that my preference and attachment to these bigger breeds will steer me in the direction of their cage and then I won't be able to say no. Thus me and the ever growing puppy will eventually be cramped into my tiny apartment. So... what to do. I've called the pound and they are overflowing so they really do need some dogs adopted out... their price is VERY reasonable considering it comes with the spay or neutering, all the dogs shots up to date and a bag of dog food. I've looked at the dogs they have and they assure me that the ones I'm looking at are medium sized mutts at best... which would be fine but I also know there is a cage full of black Labrador mixes somewhere in that shelter (I saw it on their website) and I really think I'll want one. On top of EVERYTHING else.... I don't plan on staying in this apartment forever... eventually I will want to move to a bigger space... and then their are the questions of how much will a pet deposit run me. Will I even be able to take the dog along... would it even be fair? (right now I consider it fair since although the apartment is small I live on at least a mile of river front property and hills and fields as far as the eye can see). Geeeeezzeeee... *sigh* i.e.. the reason I have stayed away from the pound. I really want a dog... I just don't think I should get one right now and it's a bummer. Truthfully I also think that I may just want a dog because I want a companion... something there that smiles at you when you come home and you get to love on. I miss when I had that before all this deployment hoopla. No, no... I'll stay away from the pound... but just know it doesn't mean I don't want one REALLY bad.

I had expected to hear from Sgt. yesterday afternoon (my time) since he e-mailed me asking when would be a good time to call. However the day kind of flew by and still no word... I knew he had just gotten back in so I figured he was tired and went to sleep early. No big deal. Last night I went to a local "spaghetti supper." It's a fund raiser for the elementary school I used to teach at and so I decided I'd go and say hello. I miss my kids so much! It was nice seeing the other teachers and principal. The principal once again asked me when I was coming back... gosh how I wish I could! My response to her is always "it's hard to turn down free living arrangements, but I really wish I could." Which is true. I get paid about the same amount here AND I am supplied with an apartment (however small it may be) and utilities. Financially this job makes more sense and I really love it so it's hard to turn down. Anyway, I got back from the spaghetti supper and logged online to check some e-mail. Low and behold my man was on! It was about 4 in the morning his time so I figured maybe he just had to get up really early for a mission. I sent him a quick message for wishes of a great day and he wrote back saying he got up so he could call. :) I love it when they're thoughtful. We were able to talk for over an hour. Huge gigantic grin the whole time. What I love most about our phone conversations is they feel so normal. We talk about stuff that's going on (he tried Iraqi pizza the other day) and stuff we've missed in each others lives... but other than that it's as if he was still back in Garrison and we were making plans for this weekend to see each other. It just makes him feel closer, if only for that hour. I didn't mention the really bad day I had Tuesday..... it really just never came up and we were talking about other things so I didn't really want to bring it up. I know he would just worry about me and it's over and done with so there's no point in him being upset over it as well. I'm glad I didn't. Anyway, overall it was a great conversation and I'm really glad I got to talk to him... it made my day/night.

Not sure what I have planned this weekend. Not a whole lot really. I think tonight I may kick back with my Cosmo, a cup of coffee and watch a movie. Possibly treat myself to a pedicure.... we'll see how it goes. Tomorrow I'm going riding again (yes, I ride horses).... hopefully they'll be a little bit more compliant and easier to catch this time. They were on to me last time and were just being lazy.... didn't want to work so it took about an hour to finally catch and saddle them. Of course the girls were out here last weekend too so that was 3 X the horses. We'll see how it goes. Then laundry.... UGH... I think I might possibly want my own washer and dryer MORE than I want a dog. Probably won't hear from the soldier at all this weekend except through e-mail... but that's more than fine with me. E-mail is better than nothing. I admire the wives and sweethearts of past wars who yearned and waited patiently for infrequent letters. I too yearn for letters ha, but I am blessed to have modern technology available to us both. It makes surviving a deployment much easier than I can imagine it would've been otherwise. In the end though... I guess that's all it boils down to. Surviving it one day at a time :).